Settling In

Today has marked a full week of being in Uganda. It has been one of the hardest weeks of my life. Thinking about where I have been at this point in my other trips. My first trip here, by now would be more than 1/4 over. My second trip here, by now would be more than 1/2 over. This time around: I have barely scratched the surface. I still have 102 more days in this country.

I say all of this to say that: as much as I have experienced and learned on my past trips to this wonderful place, I can't imagine all God has in store for me. This week I have been ecstatic, heart broken, homesick, physically sick, elated, and completely at home. I can't even imagine what is to come.

Over the past few days God has allowed me to form some bonds with my fellow missionaries, as well as the Ugandan staff members and the kids we minister to. For this I am extremely grateful. For those of you who know me well: I love my family and I have deep connections with people in the States that I left behind, so this is somewhat difficult for me being away from them for so long. But God is faithful to put people here that can make me feel at home and at ease even in this place so far from home.

Thank you for all the prayers! Please continue to pray for my health as I am still getting over this cold.

until all have heard,
lauren michelle gross

Least of these...

I have been in Uganda for 5 days. All of those days I have been sick. So a lot of the ministry I haven't been able to do because I have been resting.

Yesterday I took a short trip to the village (the rest of the team has been there for 3 days). Even in Uganda the poverty level between the city and villages is staggering.

Making the long drive to and from the village, I saw the thing that will never stop breaking my heart: children taking care of babies. Hundreds of them. I don't know each situation, whether each child had a parent who was working, whether they are orphaned children, whether they are runaways. I will never know.

But what I do know is that every time I see a baby on the back of a 5, 6,7,8 year old it breaks my heart that they have no one taking care of them and it takes all that is within me to not bring every single one of them home with me.

All I can do is pray that the Father to the Fatherless will take care of them. That He will sustain them and that He will bring them into His loving arms.

Until all have heard,
lauren michelle gross

Finally in Africa

Well, I made it. I'm finally in Uganda. Spent the last couple of hours sleeping, now meeting the Empower a Child team and other missionaries.

It was a rough journey: Got sicker and sicker the more I traveled, I didn't have internet or phone access any of the times I thought I would, I now have an eye infection, and my luggage didn't arrive (supposedly it will be here tomorrow).

All of that being said, God is faithful and I was forced to rely on Him every step of the way. Thank you for all your prayers. I am hoping to report in a couple of days that all of the above issues have been resolved. Love and miss you all!!

until all have heard,
lauren michelle gross

He is Bigger.

3 days from now, I will be leaving for Uganda. It doesn't feel real. As I sit in my mostly unpacked room I am thinking over how incredibly blessed I am.

I shared with my church on Sunday that when God began me on this journey, I told Him all reasons I couldn't do what He was calling me to, I told Him how many people would be better at it. As I listed off to Him why He had picked the wrong person, He told me repeatedly that He is enough. He told me all the reasons why He could. The things God does don't make sense to me. The way He operates astounds me. His ways are far above mine and His thoughts are far above mine.

God uses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise, and if He uses foolish things, then He definitely has the right girl.

If God is calling you to something and you're telling Him all the reasons you can't, ask Him to tell you all the reasons He can. His reasons far outweigh your excuses. His truth will shout louder than the lies of the enemy. Be encouraged that when you aren't enough, He is!

until all have heard,

lauren michelle gross

Then What Could Stand Against?!

Well, it's coming fast now. I leave for Africa in 12 days. Less than 2 weeks. This has to be the biggest step of faith I have ever taken. I am heading to a third world country for 4 months, leaving my life behind to follow the cross.

A few days ago I was listening to Chris Tomlin and his song Our God. For those of you who don't know, for the past 6, almost 7 months I have been dealing with some pretty serious health issues. I have now been diagnosed, had surgery, and have begun a treatment plan. All of this has been unnerving because at the beginning of the year I felt God calling me to Uganda on a long term trip. When you're in constant pain and for months have no idea where it's coming from or what it means... It makes you wonder... Is God really calling me there? Can I really handle it? Does He know how hard this is for me? 

Well, as I was listening to "Our God" this line struck me: 
And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us.
And if our God is with us, then what could stand against.

God is for me, because I am following Him. If I am following Him, nothing can stop me, but Him. No one can conquer me, no one can hurt me, because God is for me. Even though my health is confusing and hard, God is faithful and HE is not the author of confusion. Health issues can come against me, but they cannot stand.

Many people are worried that I am headed around the world when just a few days ago I was in the ER with extreme pain. I am less concerned, because I know who God is and I know who I am. God wouldn't send His daughter somewhere without preparing the way. So whether I'm completely healed and without pain in 12 days, or not, God is the same yesterday, today and forever. He's got me. He's not worried. He's in control and He will give me the grace to walk through whatever He's called me to. 

I trust Him and I lay down my fear. He has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.

Thanks for the prayers. They mean the world to me!

Until all have heard,

lauren michelle gross

Africa Bound

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I'm going to Africa! It's real now. Nothing is holding me back!

I just purchased my plane ticket. I will be leaving the States on August 25th and arriving in Uganda on August 27. I will return on December 14!!! I really cannot contain my excitement! I have been holding back the news of my change of plans until it was official, but now it is!

I will be working with an organization called Empower a Child that does work with orphaned and vulnerable children in Kampala, Uganda. As excited as I was to be working with Sanyu Babies Home, I think God has divinely orchestrated all of my plans and preparation for this trip. And.... Empower a Child works with Sanyu Babies Home! So I'll still be able to volunteer there.

As I prepare to leave would you partner with me in prayer over a few things?

1. I still have endometriosis and will be having a small procedure done on July 20th to try to relieve some of my pain and then will meet with my doctor about further treatment early in August.

2. There are still funds needed for my trip. If you would like to help financially, you can donate through paypal by clicking the donate button to the right. If you are unable to help, please pray that God would fill the need.

3. A trip of this magnitude is a huge step for me and I want to be totally prepared. Would you pray that God would prepare my heart and mind for all I will encounter there, as well as, prepare me to leave my home for an extended period of time?

Thank you for your prayers and support!

until all have heard,

lauren michelle gross

Fighting for Joy

These past couple of months have been filled with emotion, fear, trepidation, questioning, and many more things. For the past 2, almost 3 months now have been some of the hardest of my life.While trying to prepare for taking one of the biggest steps of my life... going to Uganda for 5 months, the enemy has been on the offense attacking me in more ways than I care to count.

3 months ago I started struggling with abdominal pain. I prayed, my family prayed, my church prayed, people all around the world prayed for healing, for understanding, for treatment. It didn't come. So, after returning from a trip up and down the East Coast I began to seek medical help. Test after test. Doctor visit after doctor visit. medication after medication. An ER visit. No answer for what was causing me so much pain. 

Last week I saw a different doctor and finally got an answer... endometriosis. I began to do research on what this meant, what the treatment is and what the implications are. As I read I got scared. All I've ever wanted to be is a mom and reading about infertility caused by endometriosis scares me. 

I having been fighting for Joy. not happiness, joy. Something that doesn't go away when I'm in pain, when I'm afraid, or any other thing that I've felt over the last few months. If the joy of the Lord is my strength, then I need joy, because I need strength to get through this. 

Over the next  2 or 3 weeks, I will see 2 more doctors and have countless more tests and procedures done, but through all of it I will fight for Joy. I wrote the following over a week ago, but it's still true...

"Right now more than anything i would love to wallow in self pity and complain about my day... but Jesus is still on the throne, I know God's promises for my life, I know that He has a plan for everything, I know that if God is for me then nothing can stand against me, I know the healer and He knows me. I know the enemy has come to kill, steal, and destroy; but God has given me life and life more abundantly. I rejoice and rest in Him and I believe He will bring answers and healing in His perfect timing. I am going to bed in the arms of my Savior and nothing can touch me while I'm there."

until all have heard,

lauren michelle gross